Slow Down! Your Family is Waiting for You!!

On Thu, 12 Jan 2006 07:09:14 -0800, Scott en Aztlán
> wrote:

>Just saw a smarmily sanctimonious TV commercial. It shows a guy
>driving an SUV, intercut with a child's birthday party; the
>implication is that this man is rushing home because he's late for his
>son's birthday. They show the man passing other vehicles on the
>freeway, and then in a later shot he runs a red light and T-bones
>another car. The commercial then cuts to a shot of a body being
>unloaded at the morgue. The finger-wagging announcer's voice comes on
>and says "Slow down! Your family's waiting for you."
>
>What the Claybrookian morons who made that commercial are incapable of
>understanding is that SPEED HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MAN'S DEATH!
>The primary cause of this dramatized death is because a driver ran a
>red light and struck another vehicle, not because he was speeding.
>
>****ing idiots...
>

Well, I could re-do the commercial and say "Speed Up, God is Waiting
for You.

It shows a guy driving about 125 MPH in his SUV, intercut with a God
sitting on his throne eating birthday cake at a party; the
implication is that this man is rushing because he's late for Gods
birthday. They show the man passing other vehicles on the
freeway, and then in a later shot he runs a red light and T-bones
a garbage truck filled with plastic Jesus bobbleheads. The commercial
then cuts to a shot of a body ascending into heaven. The middle
finger-wagging announcer's voice comes on and says "Drive Fast - God
is waiting for you."

Jesus Saves - God Recycles